I don’t think I’ve been a people pleaser for a long time now. I realized a long time ago that it’s not my job to make people happy.
It’s not my job to make you happy.
If you’re not happy, there’s not a damn thing I can do about it, and so I stopped trying.
So what’s the step after being a people pleaser? It’s being a “people appeaser”.
Being a people appeaser basically means you aren’t trying to make people happy, but you are still trying to make sure you don’t piss people off. You try to not make them feel uncomfortable about any situation or about themselves so you basically go into neutral where you appease the world with your inactivity or your neutrality. You don’t do nuthin’. And then you get to the point where you won’t do that either.
What happens when you’re a people appeaser is you start to die to YOU.
You leave yourself like an unwatered flower to whither. You die to yourself because being neutral isn’t authentic either. It’s nothing.
So at some point, you might decide it’s time to become a people pisser offer.
Now, this isn’t an intentional act of heartless rebellion. This is kind of like, I’m gonna do me, and I’m gonna do me the way I want to do me and the only way I know how to do me, and I’m gonna do it whether it pisses you off or not.
It’s a really good place to be but it’s a place where you might lose some of the people you were pleasing and appeasing in the past. The people who ponder your audacity to be who you finally are. This you that’s been waiting, curled up inside you to finally unfurl in the light of day. My question is: who are you not to be exactly who you are?
What it comes down to is doing you. And the people who accept this or resonate with you stick with you.
So we go from pleasing to appeasing to pissing off. And it’s not out of “dislove” for anybody. And it’s not out of “disloyalty” to anybody. It’s out of necessity for you to be exactly who God put you on the planet to be instead of fitting into someone’s preconceived notion of what your sacred purpose is on this planet. And if people can’t handle you being you, walk away.
Life is too short to not live.